screw it..

Are my friends really my friends? i mean..they are treating me like....whatever laa. i feel like so

damn annoyed lately. form 1...form2...now form 3...thgs are just going down hill at the momment...maybe its just me..being emo and crap..but thats me..live with it?! if you are my friend...you wouldnt even GIVE A DAMN about how i am. seriously...I HAVE TO ASK TO TALK?! WOW...dats just freaking awesome..i should ask wether i cn luk at my frens too..yea...tat would be awesome...i should be their dog..bark whole day long and gt slapped at for doing nothing...i trusted you..and now you did this? hah..thanks...you finally woke me up..I WONT EVER TRUST ANYONE FULLY ANYMORE!?!?!...so kindly

move away..and thanks again...you freaking rock my world..i rather be alone now..

read it and weep signing off disapointed=[

daaaammmmnnnn.....><

guess apa ini? its da sign of FRIENSHIP^^

gawd i cant rmbr the last time i wrote me bloggie. and i truly apologize for leavin u bloggie. i duno wats wrong with me lately. i dun even want to touch my diary..and read wat i ever wrote..da pain is just so hurtly..i cant handle it..luking at my golden cover...filled with puffy white bunnies...i use to fill with my emotions..and secrets...i just cant do it anymore...im just a coward..for this..im worthless arent i? haizz...as if anyone reads my blog.==

skul started like two weeks ago..1st day for kinda scary..but i survived. haha. ntg much happeened lor. leesha's bday..we had tons of fun laughin n posing withh leesha's statue.haha.played with her cat..and everyone had to wear red and black...awesome...^^haha. den along came zhen's bday..he said he didnt want anythg..but..im a pro..and decided to gt stg. haha. andrea was so nice to share la..feel so malu..and guilty. haaaiiyyooo.==. anyways..so i was walkin along pavi..and went to EX...and saw a black wallet with green abstract art on it..and my mind said.."YES!! this is zhen's!" hahah. so bote it lu. hahah.n he likes it..omg..im so hapi wen ppl actually like n use my presents. haaa...:D...!!

im still missing him so much. i gues i deserve da way he's ttreatin me. i mean..i din stay der by his side all da tym..like he did for me. i feel lyk a jinx la..i mean..once im closer to sum1..eventually another becomes further..and den wen okok dy..next one comes along. it feels so frustrating for me. aarrggghh. and lately he's closer to her..and..i mean..of course he cn be with her..but..i feel jealous..cz..i just miss spending time with him so badly. again..my stupid emo-ness..cause me. it feels like crap la..when someone so close to you..just drifts away...and u feel like a part of you is gone..and ur nt complete la u noe? HHAHHA..im talkin to myself..*whacks forehead* gawd..im actually lying to myself for being hapi? ==..lame..

i cant believe i actually teared up talkin abt em to him today...at tuition. i mean..he's an awesome fren. haha. so sweet and ccaring as usual. mr romanctic...><...boy..anygal would be damn lucky to have him..he's jz so...aahaha,,duno hw to say la...hmmm special? yea..special..=)..one malu thg to say...shhhhsss....i like hw it feels wen he puts his arms around my shouders..i just feel so warm and save..so loved..><


i mis carmen and chuiyin soooo much. doh i gt to see chuiyin more often. i mis carmen. absense reli does make da heart go fonder..im nt les><..bt dey are like so important to me..and noone cn replace them both. heck..noone cn replace all da frens i have now..nobody..i love them all so much and caree for them deeply..i jz hope they know dat..( doh no1 reads da blog==)

THANKS TO ALL MY FRENS DAT HAVE SUPPORTED ME AND HELPED ME..WHILE I WAs IN PAIN> SORI IF I EVER HURT YOU...if its too much to ask for their forgiveness...i reli hope we all cn remain frens for a long tym..praying hard^^..

well tats all for now..malas nk tulis dah..ahhaha..tc..

read it and weep signin out..peace! =)